Grab Life by the Balls

Grab Life by the Balls - by C-Section Comics

When everything around you falls
and you feel that despair crawls
on your back or up the walls,
go and grab life by the balls.

Don’t let life own your butthole.
Stand up strong and take control!
Fight life with your heart and soul,
lest you’ll get life’s ten-inch pole.

This was just a figure of speech,
Life’s in fact a big bad bitch.
She has no balls, so best you reach
one of her nips and give it a twitch.

Rabbit or Duck

Rabbit or Duck - by C-Section Comics


Rabbit or duck? Try your best luck.
Can it be both? Of course not, you schmuck!
Is it a matter of narrative? Nay.
It’s a matter of facts, not stories. Okay?
There’s only one truth, the answer is one.
So don’t be a quack (I know it’s a pun)
and tell me the answer right now or begone.
Shit, it was a T-Rex, and it bloodied the lawn.

Here are some more cartoons about animals.

Dumb Aliens

Dumb Aliens - Cartoon by C-Section Comics

If aliens would come to Earth,
this is what I’d say:
“Dude, you crazy? Turn around
and swiftly fly away!”
Yes, telling up from down is hard
in zero gravity,
but travelling to Earth is
outright clear stupidity.
Let’s all face it, planet Earth
is quite the place to fear.
Wars and death and plagues and rape
are plentiful down here.
Some are optimistic. Me?
I don’t see a breakthrough.
So launch your ship up back to space
and please do take me with you.

Pistachios Are the Fruit of the Hard Working Man

Pistachios comic

Pistachios Are for Hard Working Men / by C-Section Comics


Are pistachios really
for hard-working men?
To me it sounds more like
a pain than a gain.
You flex up your muscles
You put up a sweat
You work really hard
And what do you get?
A modest reward,
a moment of joy.
Two moments you say?
You’re lucky oh boy!
Long minutes of work
for a short lasting prize?
That doesn’t sound smart,
so you must realize
that pistachios are dumb,
and please take no offense,
but it’s working for peanuts
in the literal sense.

——

The Lowest Form of Humor

The Lowest Form of Humor by C-Section Comics

Here’s a fun fact: the world’s oldest recorded joke in history, which dates back to 1900BC, is in fact a Sumerian fart joke, which goes like this: “Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband’s lap.”
Women, right guys?

 

Also, couldn’t think of pun/racist-humor combination without being reminded of this: