Comic Archives - Page 7 of 76

Tricky Tony – No Alcohol

Tricky Tony was pulled over, blue lights flickering.
Cop thought he was drunk because he won’t stop snickering.
– “Is there an open alcohol container in the car?”
– “Teeheehee no officer, there is none, not by far!”
He giggled evilly and thought: “This is a nice cheat,
an open deodorant stick just lays there on my seat!
It is known it has a lot of alcohol, and hey,
too much of it and I’ll surely end up in AA.”

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All Tricky Tony comics here (click on individual post to see the bonus panels).
A previous comic on alcohol and alcoholism here.

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Get pulled over by my comics on Instagram and Twitter.

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The Balloon

A dream is just like a balloon:
shiny, colorful, and fun.
Quick, pursue it, pick it up,
Hurry, grab it! Run! Run! Run!

Life is the annoying hand
which holds a metal pin. Oh shit,
guess you weren’t quick enough,
’cause the balloon was popped by it.

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Here’s another comic about life.

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More dream shattering comics on Instagram and Twitter.

Swear Jar

Artie thought his swear jar was
a SWEAT jar. Boy that’s awkward, huh?
Every time that Artie sweat he’d
put some money in it. Duh.
This is why he made his best to
sweat as little as he could.
Always drank ice-cold soft drinks,
he never touched no spicy food.
When Autumn came he liked the breeze
cooling him and blowing leaves.
When winter came he wouldn’t wear a coat,
he only wore short sleeves.
He never took a stressful test,
and direct sunlight he would hate.
So many efforts not to sweat,
he wouldn’t even masturbate!
When Katey told him all about
her secret crush for him, alas,
he sweat so hard, lost all his money
to a jar that’s made of glass.

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Here’s another comic about a misunderstanding.

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Make sure your sweat jar is full by getting exciting comics on your Instagram and Twitter feeds.

Useless Man

You’re so useless ’round the house
you can’t even lift a hammer.
Why did I make you my spouse?
Life with you lacks joy or glamor.
You’re a useless man, you are.
Why can’t you be like my daddy?
He lifts hammers, he’s a star,
he is Thor! And you my laddie,
are you useless? This is tough…
Help me open this jam jar!
You succeeded? Wow you’re useful,
way more than I thought, by far.

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Here’s another comic featuring a Marvel Superhero.

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You can usefully follow my comics on Instagram and Twitter.

You can also subscribe to the new YouTube channel here.

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This comic made me recall a real old comic of mine showing how man evolved from a vicious hunting machine in to a modern useless man.

Live Forever

Human rubs the lamp, swish-swish:
“To live forever, that’s my wish!”
Genie answers with a sigh:
“Your latest wish I must deny.
Son, you seem to be quite clever:
You can’t wish to live forever.
Eternal life? There’s no such thing,
’cause nothing is eternal – ZING!
All things once did not exist,
therefore nothing will persist
forever. Everything must end.
It’s sad but it is true my friend.
Planet Earth, the Milky Way,
will totally be gone one day.
Many billion years ahead
all you know will be quite dead:
plants and animals, mankind
(yes I know it blows your mind)
buildings, mountains, deserts, seas.
All the various histories
of all civilizations will
not be remembered. Whoa man, chill!
It’s pointless to be grim or sad.
Just live your life, it’s pretty rad!
Well, ‘Ignorance is bliss’, they say,
and you’re alive, so seize the day!”

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Live life to the fullest by following my comics on Instagram and Twitter.

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Here’s another comic featuring the Genie of the Lamp.
Here’s a comic dealing with what we can’t accomplish even if we live to be a hundred.
And here are some complementary comics about nihilism.

Carpe Diem all. Seize the day.