Are you there Margaret? It’s me, God.
Here’s the truth girl, you’ll be awed:
There’s no meaning to your life;
The world is filled with pain and strife;
Suffering is all too rife;
Don’t expect an afterlife;
Every hope ends in despair;
There’s no point in faith or prayer;
Margaret, are you still there?
Oh shit! don’t jump off the chair
with that rope tied ’round you neck!
I was kidding, what the heck?
Life is great! It’s all we’ve got:
Food and sex and smoking pot,
video games, TV and books,
life is better than it looks.
Finding purpose? We’ll get there –
just don’t jump off that fucking chair.