Tag: Sleep

Sleeping Beauty

Sleeping Beauty - Sleep for a HUNDRED YEARS

Sleeping beauty couldn’t fall
asleep. She couldn’t sleep at all.
Her phone’s to blame. Wait, it gets worse:
Maleficent’s own sleeping curse
couldn’t make her shut her eyes.
To me it comes as no surprise
that she’s immune to sleeping spells.
Bye-bye fair prince, bye wedding bells.
She’s off to check her social feed,
it’s really all she’ll ever need.

————

Here is another sad tale featuring two Disney Princesses.
And here’s what happens when I use my phone in bed.

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Phone in Bed

Phone in Bed - by C-Section Comics

Phone in Bed / by C-Section Comics

 

I used to count a lot of sheep
just before I went to sleep
but now I take my phone to bed,
it helps relax my weary head.

A YouTube vid with funny cats,
news article ’bout democrats,
another WhatsApp message – beep –
my phone will help me go to sleep.

And when I finally turn it off
disturbing thoughts my mind would cough:
Work, death, who said earthquake?
my sanity is here at stake.

Who wants to be awake ’till dawn?
Not me! I’ll turn my phone back on.
I sure don’t want to stay awake,
a new approach I’ll therefore take:

Get ready Brazzers, here I come!
(pun intended, roll the drum),
I’m going on a jerkoff blitz –
instead of sheep, I’m counting tits!

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Got till here? Don’t leave so soon.
Check out this related toon:
“Phone addiction? Read the contract:
You’ll be making less eye contact.”