Bethlehem. 2000 years ago. The Madonna of the Jägermeister.
Inspired by this post on reddit
Merry Christmas y’all
The habit of having eight days of presents for Khanukah is a rather recent, less traditional aspect of the Jewish festival of lights. It’s common today mostly in North America, imitating the habit of exchanging gifts on Christmas Eve.
And now for the price. There are numerous ways to pronounce Khanukah, but in order to properly pronounce it (as in Ḥănukkāh, in Hebrew – חֲנֻכָּה or חנוכה) you have to be either a Jew, a German, a Scotsman or a Klingon. The ‘Kh’ in Khanukah is pronounced like the “ch” in German “ach” or Scottish “loch”, or the “H” in Klingon (that throaty sound that Klingons make that sounds as if they’re clearing their throats or choking on a traditional jelly doughnut).
There at least as many ways of writing Khanukah as there are pronouncing it. According to Wiktionary, Hanukkah is the most popular form, but you can also write it as Chanukah, Hanukah, Hanuka, Chanuka, Chanukka, Chanukkah, Hannuka, Khanukah, Chanuko, Channukah, Hannukah, Channuka, Hanukka, Chanuca and Chanuccah. The forms Hannukka, Channukkah and Chanucca are very rare.
Confused? You won’t be after this video showing how to pronounce Khanukah:
Instead of spoiling yourself with eight days of presents, why not read some more comics about Jewish traditions, like this one about how the patriarch Abraham screwed generations of Jews, or this one about Jewish weddings, or this recent one about the wonderful Jewish tradition of arguing.
Happy Hanukkah and Merry Christmas everybody!
For the record, I’m Jewish and have never celebrated Christmas.
Whichever holiday you celebrate, whether it’s Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or Festivus – you should celebrate it proudly, and you should have the right to celebrate it in public.
Happy holidays, and see you in 2015!